Chapter 10
Raphael
Trying to talk to my mother was heartbreaking
semories of my mother were of more Itakan than English if she was really riled up. Now she struggled to get out even words, I could hardly understand her.
ho talked fast, talked loudly and usually moved in
But she had made one thing abundantly clear. She didn’t want Bethany to leave Mom had gone so far as to point her finger at me and shake it, like
she was threatening me
We sat down on the old sofa in the living room, facing the fireplace. We
careful to keep a big space, the width of one cushion between us
Bethany sat stiffly, like the was sitting in church, her back so straight it looked like her neck might snap. Her fingers twisted nervously in her lap and she kept her eyes glued on her daughter, as her daughter struggled to drag the big package out from under the Christmas
a big?” Lucy grunted as she pulled it into the center of the room. Then she stopped and looked at her mother. “Can I open
Bethany forced a stiff smile. “Mr. Segreto brought it for you. You may open it
“What is Uncle Segretto? Lucy you can call me Uncle Rafe I corrected
I could see a red flush creeping up Bethany’s neck. I thought I understood her discomfort. After seven years, was no reason the kid had to suffer for it.
going to be awkward. But there
Lucy grinned and tore into the packaging, bits of paper flying everywhere. Inside the paper was a giant stuffed bear, wearing a Santa hat and a knitted Christmas sweater which said “Beary Christmas” in bright red yarn.
“Oh, wow, thank you Uncle Rafel it’s so big! And so soft! She clutched the bear, which was almost as tall as she was
“Why don’t you go show Nane Charlie before you take it up to your room? Beth suggested softly. And the child tore out of the room, carrying the grant teddy bear on her back. A moment later I could hear her childish voice chattering away to my mother in the kitchen.
Bethany cleared her throat, and forced her fingers to be still by pressing her palms against her thighs. Something she always did when she was nervous. “Thank you for the gift, it was very generous of you”
“It was nothing.” I waved away her gratitude. “We all got off to a bad start, and I wanted to make it up to her
“Yes,” Bethany agreed.
“1 went to see my brother at the lake house” I said, watching her face for reaction
She grimaced slightly and said nothing, but I saw her fingernails dig into the fabric of her trousers
“I didn’t realize that you and Gabe had gotten divorced. I’m sorry?
She gave me a fake, tight–lipped smile. “No apology necessary. It was the best thing for all of us.” She tipped her chin up sightly, like she was trying to be brave. Like she was trying to make it true.
The thing was, I wasn’t really sorry at a
at all. But I pushed that thought aside.
“So, Gabe told me that you are the one who has been caring for Mom since her stroke.”
“Yes, that’s correct”
“Can you tell me how her recovery has been?”
For about ten minutes she talked about Mom’s treatments. There was speech therapy once a week and physical therapy three times a week. Mom’s progress had been slow, but positive. She was able to walk short distances with the walker, feed herself, chew and swallow her food without choking She made it sound like even the few words Mom was able to speak were signs of progress.
Clearly. Barthany had been giving Mom the best care, far better than any stranger could have done. Mom was able to stay in her own home, with someone she loved, and that was probably worth more than whatever salary Gabe was paying her.
“So, um, you bought Mountain Top?” She said, ging me a sideways look. 1 remember the summer we spent working in the riding stables.”
fear that I might accidentally touch her, she was still single she might bolt off
“Yeah, I let my arm rest on the back of the couch. There was no couch if I made any sudden moves.
thec
Such a contrast from the younger Beth, who used to burrow under my arm at every opportunity. The girl who used to hold my hand in the car on our
y to work at the resort in the early mornings. The girl would sneak into the tack room for a kiss, even though we both smelled like horse sweat.
ure and saddle soap.
The girl who had looked at me like I was the only man in the world.
Now she looked at me warty kke I might throw her out of the house.
my fingers like it
I had a weird compulsion to reach out and touch her hair, to see if it was as soft and silky as I remembered, if it still curled around my fingers wanted to touch me as much as I longed to feel it. It did, and I rubbed the strands between my fingers, savoring the texture, and the bitter–sweet memes it evoked
I
Her eyes widened, and her breath caught. Suddenly, that cushion separating us seemed like the Grand Canyon. And I was going to cross it, because i wanted to get closer. But as soon as I shifted off my weight, she bolted off the couch like she’d been shot from a canon.
“Let me just clean up this mess…” she muttered, as she started gathering the scraps of wrapping paper.
I sat and watched her, noticing the way she bit her bottom lip, the way she kept her eyes down as she swept up the paper with her hands and then wadded it up. Was she that tense and uptight because of me? Or was there something else?
I stood, and stepped next to her.
I knew it was dangerous, ill–advised. This was a woman I should be avoiding at all costs. She’d betrayed me once. I would never give her the opportunity to do it again. But I couldn’t seem to help myself, I wanted, needed to push her. Her hands, full of wadded up wrapping paper, shook nervously as she stared up at me.
How could she still look so guileless, so innocent?
Those lips still looked so… kissable.
I had to remind myself that my brother had kissed those lips. The thought should have been chilling, but somehow, it didn’t even seem relevent.
I looked over at the arched doorway and tilted my head. “There’s no mistletoe this year,” I murmured, stepping away from her.
“Yeah, I, um, didn’t hang one this year.”
When I looked into her eyes, they seemed haunted and extra moist. I stood under the archway and looked up the carved staircase. “I’m just going to go have a look at my old room. It is still… my old room, right?”
She clutched the paper against her chest like a shield. “Um, y
yes, B
But it’s locked. I’ll go get the key” She turned and practically ran from the room
