Chapter 11
Raphael
Walking up the staircase was strangely nostalgic. The fourth and seventh stairs still creaked and groaned under my weight, reminding me of how Gabe and used to avoid those steps whenever we wanted to sneak outside without Mom knowing
But she always knew. She had that Italian mother spidey–sense that always landed Gabe and I in trouble. As I walked down the hall, I saw the door to Gabe’s old room was open, and I realized that must be where Beth slept. It no longer resembled the cluttered teenage–boy pig pen I had grown up next to. Instead, the full–sized bed had been covered with a soft, feminine lilac quilt, and the sport–themed curtains had been replaced by white lace.
She followed me up the stairs and offered me a key, which dangled from a keychain shaped like Italy
“Why is the door locked?”
Beth clasped her hands and looked down at the floor. “After you left, Gabe wanted to clear your room, but Charlie wouldn’t allow it. I think she kept the door locked to make sure that he wouldn’t sneak in and throw your things away when she wasn’t around.”
I stared at her and digested that information. Why would Gabe want to remove my things? There were two other guest rooms in the house, so it’s not like he needed the space. I pushed the key into the old lock, and then opened the door.
T’m sorry it’s so dusty. No one has been here since Charlie had the stroke. I didn’t expect…anyone would need to use the room, Beth said quietly
It was like walking into a time warp. A dusty, cobweb–strewn time warp, just as I had left it seven years ago. My graduation cap was still hanging on The bedpost, photos were still tucked in the frame of the mirror, posters of my favorite sports stars were still on the wall, slightly yellowed and curling at the edges. High school and college trophies were still on the shelf, hosting untold numbers of spiders, and the clock radio was still on the bedside table, and still plugged in, although the digital time display was blinking 12:00 from some past power failure
On my desk was a pile of framed photographs. I walked over and lifted the first one from the pile, and realized it was my senior portrait. All the photos were of me, from my childhood, straight up through my graduation from college. Someone had taken them off the walls downstairs and left them up there, like they were removing my memory from the family entirely.
“I can clean it for you, if you like, Beth offered. She was still standing in the doorway, wringing her hands anxiously.
I walked to the dusty mirror and picked a strip of photo booth photos from the frame. I remembered the day we took that photo. Beth had sat on my lap, and I’d slipped my hands under her shirt and kissed her neck before the machine started taking our pictures. Her eyes were wide, and her cheeks were flushed as she smiled shyly into the camera, while I sat behind her looking like a smug son–of–a–b.itch.
Why not? i had the whole world in my hands at that moment. I never guessed that she would slip away from me so easily.
1, with the
Turning to the queen–sized bed, the dusty royal blue comforter, I was bombarded with more memories. Beth and I had made love on that bed many times, from the first time she gave me her her virginity, to the night before it all went to hell. I could still picture her sweet, pale body against my dark sheets, her lush curves and full, natural breasts. I could practically hear her breathy moans, stifled behind my hand as I covered her mouth to keep the whole house from hearing her pleasure.
I sighed and looked up at the ceiling, just so that I was looking anywhere but at the bed. Even fuzzy with dust, it was dragging
memories.
It was then that I noticed a slight water stain near the window, “How long has that been there?”
gout the most lurid
Beth jumped, as if my voice had startled her. Like she, too, had been lost in her memories. She looked at the alight discoloration in the paint and her face faded to another shade of pale. “I’m not sure,” she said, with a slight shake of her head. “Like I said, no one has been in here since Charlie got sick, and L-
“You what?”
She took a step backwards. 7 haven’t been here since you left”
“Have any repairs been made to the roof since Mom.. you know?” “No.”
I walked closer to the window and examined the stain. There should be a leak somewhere. It’s small now, but it needs to be taken care of before it does serious damage “I glanced back at Beth and saw a strange look on her face, like she was actually afraid. “Don’t worry, I’ll talk to Gabe about it.”
“No!” her retort was unexpectedly sharp. “Don’t bother Gabe. I’ll take care of ”
(an evebrow bu
shrugged. I didn’t know what kind of arrangement she had with my brother
their divorce, and I told myself I didn’t
it would be better for everyone if i stayed the hell out of the business
“Okay, then stuffed the photo booth photos into my pocket I walked out of the room, as eager to leave the memories as I was to leave the dust and grime. “Maybe it would be a good idea to have the room aired out and cleaned. Just to keep any vermin from taking up residence there.”
“Yes, of course,” she said too quickly. There isn’t really any reason to keep it locked up now, anyway. I mean, Lucy and I aren’t going to bother your things. And Gabe
He doesn’t come around prompted
I had so many questions. Didn’t Gabe come to see Mom? To see Lucy? But before I could ask, Beth had skittered away. By the time I descended the stars, I could hear her voice in the kitchen taking softly to Mom and Lucy Lucy had the stuffed bear propped up in a chair at the table while the child herself was half stone half squatting
she read out loud from a children’s book.
Not a picture book, but a book with short chapters that seemed to be quite above her age level. I certainly hadn’t been reading chapter books in kindergarten. She looked up and grinned at me when I entered the kitchen, and I noticed for the first time that she was missing one of her bottom teeth. “We’re having chicken drumsticks for dinner Lucy said with sweet frankness. Would you like to stay for dinner?”
“Lucy” Beth quietly reprimanded her daughter
was unexpectedly tempting. It would be so nice to sit around the kitchen table and eat dinner like a family again. But judging by the look on Beth’s face, not to mention the very small package of chicken she had taken out of the fridge, she wasn’t prepared to serve a guest that evening.
“Thanks for the invite, kiddo.” I said with a smile. “But I’ve got to get back to the resort. I’ve got lots to do to make it ready for guests again. Let’s do it another time, okay?
“Yeah, okay” Lucy stuck a bookmark in her book “Maybe we can have a pizza night”
“Pizza night, huh? That sounds like an idea. What do you think Mom?” I winked at the kid, and then leaned down to give my mother a kiss on her soft, wrinkled cheek. She blinked, twice, which I had established was her way of saying yes. She smiled, but only half of her mouth responded.
I turned to look at Beth, but her expression was confusing
She looked sad
Unbearably sad.
